


Trade Safety for Obedience

by literalfuckinggarbage



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Caleb Widogast Deserves Nice Things, Caleb Widogast Needs a Hug, Caleb Widogast-centric, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Essek Thelyss Needs a Hug, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, POV Caleb Widogast, Spells & Enchantments, Touch-Starved Essek Thelyss, Whump, background nein - Freeform, spoilers for episode 128 and probably others
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-06
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-11 23:21:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29875575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/literalfuckinggarbage/pseuds/literalfuckinggarbage
Summary: What if they hadn't found the plane shift scroll and tuning fork in episode 128? What if Caleb had walked past them all down the stairs and given himself up to Ikithon?
Relationships: Essek Thelyss/Caleb Widogast
Comments: 28
Kudos: 93





	Trade Safety for Obedience

"Show me the other options," Caleb spat, trying to hide the way his hands were shaking. If he was going to do this, he would need to be steady, for his friends, and to face his old teacher. “What other choice do we have?”

Fjord was beginning to look around Yussa’s study in desperation. “There has to be something useful in here.”

“If there is, we can’t find it and figure out how to use it in time. They are _coming.”_ Caleb began to give up his search of Yussa’s desk and spared another glance to the wizard lost in the Astral Plane. “Veth said Trent is just three blocks away, and Astrid and Wulf would not have warned us to leave now if we did not need to find safety _now.”_

"I hate this," Jester said, frowning darkly but unable to keep her eyes from darting back and forth to her mother, still reeling from the walk through the Open Quay.

"I'll be fine. They're not completely unreasonable people. Perhaps even Astrid and Wulf will be able to accompany us to Eiselcross," Caleb said, though the sick feeling that had been growing in his stomach since they'd set eyes on the Vergesson Sanatorium only continued to twist and gnaw at his insides. “Maybe I... trade your safety for my obedience.”

Caduceus said softly, “There is no safety without you.” He’d been watching Caleb carefully since they’d left Vergesson, but he wasn’t going to see anything but anxiety and terror. This was new, though Caleb supposed he had to look at least vaguely similar after the death of Mollymauk. At least then he’d had a plan that wouldn’t land him back in the jaws of the Cerberus Assembly.

“If they take you, then our next stop is a jailbreak,” Beau said sharply, sending a glare Caleb’s way. Yasha was standing behind her, looking just as determined.

He shook his head fimly. They didn’t have time for this. It wasn’t like they really needed him anyway. They would have Essek to fulfill the role of an arcane caster, and it wasn’t like he wasn’t already going to be a liability with Lucien’s anti magic cone. “There’s no other option. You do not have time for that. The world doesn’t have time for that.”

"There has to be another way," Veth said. She knew more than anyone what these people were capable of. She knew what Caleb was like before meeting the Nein. And that was already with years of separation from anyone to do with the Assembly or the Academy.

As his scars itched, he could have laughed. Who would have thought any progress he might have made could be wiped away so quickly? 

He supposed he would always be a coward.

Looking around at Luc and Yeza sitting nearby, waiting for Veth alongside Marion, still looking exhausted even from her journey to Tidepeak Tower, Caleb made up his mind. For once in his godforsaken life, he wasn't going to let himself be a coward. Not when he could be the ones to save his friends from the dogs barking at his heels. He moved to the doorway.

"I'll try to convince them. If all goes well, I'll be right back." The lie tasted sour on his tongue but he had to do something. It was his selfishness, staying with them all in the first place, that had put them in this danger. If he went now, he could save them. Perhaps if he played his cards right, he could even save Essek from the inside.

This could be a good thing.

He’d been undeserving of their kindness for so long now. It was time for it to end.

He turned back, "If I'm gone for long, you can contact Allura or Essek to bring you back to Eiselcross. I will try not to be, but I might have to meet you there."

Another lie, this one bitter and acrid.

Before they could protest, he was taking steps two at a time. It was their only plan, and they knew it.

Beau caught his arm, eyes wide with panic and fury. “Caleb, we can find another way. The sewers-”

"Excuse me, you really can't be in here-" Wensforth said, trying to block Wulf from pushing his way inside.

“Go,” Caleb pushed Beau away, pulling back to go downstairs.

Caleb wasn't expecting the disappointed, almost stricken look on Wulf's face. It was mirrored by Astrid’s before the three of them all adopted the masks they wore well in times like these. 

"It's a conversation you'd like, correct?" he asked, feeling the bile in the back of his throat begin to rise. Though he'd eaten nothing since he vomited off Veth's balcony, he still felt like he might be ill. "Let's talk."

Trent walked through the door then, sickly smile across his jaundiced features. "Well that took you long enough, Bren. Eadwulf, would you hold him still? Don't want any more ridiculous escape attempts." He turned to face Caleb, “Or any more fire. I thought you’d give that up after your failure.”

Standing next to Trent, Astrid, and Wulf, it made all the screaming in his ears echo even louder. The pained, panicked voices of Leofric and Una Ermendrud as they burned alive rang in his ears. The smell of burning hair and flesh filled his lungs as he tried 

Wulf raised his hand, a hint of regret not quite hidden in his eyes as he cast telekinesis and lifted Caleb six inches off the ground. He struggled to breathe, knowing Wulf could crush him easily like this, but he was more concerned with Trent pulling out his spellbook and beginning to recite a familiar spell.

He swallowed, wondering if he'd be able to resist it and pretend it took hold. It was a hell of a longshot. Under the crushing grasp of the telekinesis, he couldn't even motion to counterspell as he felt the Geas spell take hold. All the animosity left him as his glare towards Trent, towards Master Ikithon, softened.

Master Ikithon smiled even wider, speaking the one command word. "Obey."

~

Jester stared down out the window, just peeking, with Veth at her side.

She couldn’t help but feel like this was her fault.

Earlier she’d felt so terrible about how Caleb was killing those guards, but the one she’d charmed and left alive had come back to haunt her almost immediately. Caleb hadn’t been wrong about them being evil after all. Or at the very least complicit in too many terrible things to count.

Not to mention she had picked Veth’s family’s house to teleport to. It had seemed safe at the time, but now she’d gone and endangered Yeza and Luc too. Caduceus was so smart to have his teleportation spot be the Wildmother lighthouse. Next time she would set it up somewhere better. Somewhere safer. Maybe that little spot near the beach they’d rested. If they made it out of here.

Jester trusted Caleb to get them out of there, but she didn’t trust him to take care of himself. Caleb was always so careful around their families, making sure that she and Veth could visit Nicodranas whenever they wanted. He’d even made that special room in the tower for Luc and the laboratory to share with Yeza and Luc. It was clear to Jester that Caleb would put the safety of their families above himself in almost any circumstance.

He was always so hard on himself, and the way he’d been acting today scared her. It reminded her of how he was in Trostenwald, or how he acted after Molly died. This though, when she knew what he was scared of, when she’d felt Trent Ikithon’s magic fizzle her own with barely a lifted finger, she was terrified.

She could barely look at the crystals they’d stolen. The dumb things that had gotten them caught, and they were the stupid things that made it so Caleb couldn’t go long without scratching his arms, a tick that always worried her.

“They’re moving,” she hissed, bumping Veth as she saw a group of five people leaving Tidepeak Tower. From her position kneeling on the ground beside Veth, she probably wasn’t being sneaky enough, but she didn’t care. She just wanted to make sure Caleb was okay. She wanted to make sure they’d all be okay.

It was Ikithon, Astrid, Wulf, and that weird old scourger lady Veth told them about, all walking around Caleb. Icy cold fear shot through her system despite the warm Nicodranas air.

“Why is Caleb leaving with them?” Veth asked, hurriedly grabbing the wire.

Jester just stared.

This was her fault.

She’d told that guard about her momma, and about Nicodranas, and now everything was going to shit.

“Caleb, do you need us to come rescue you? What’s happening? Cough if you’re in danger! Youcanreplytothismessage.”

Veth put down the copper wire with a dark frown. “He says he’s going with them, and he’ll meet up with us later. He said to trust him.”

“Fuckin' shit balls,” Beau hissed. She looked like she was looking for something to break.

Honestly, Jester wouldn’t have blamed her. If she could move, she might want to break something in Yussa’s stupid tower too.

“Veth, can you follow them again, invisible?” Caduceus asked. “We could make sure he’s okay from afar.”

“We could message each other, since Caleb can’t right now,” Yasha offered, still not understanding the message spell very well.

Veth just cursed, “I’m tapped, but guys-”

Beau interrupted, “Well, I can go follow them, jumping on like rooftops and stuff-”

“Guys!” Veth said, “They’re gone.”

Jester whipped back to the window, seeing the last crackling of arcane energy left behind from a teleportation spell.

Fuckin' shit balls.

**Author's Note:**

> kudos & comments are good for my soul <3
> 
> I'll update this one on Fridays!


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